When I was 25 years old, I had it all, or at least by society’s standards. I was in a happy, healthy relationship and we had built a home together. I had a stable job and was making more money than ever before. And yet, every now and again I’d walk out the front door in the morning and wonder to myself “Is this it? Is this as good as it gets?” Even though I seemingly had everything my heart should desire, I felt like something was missing. Deep down I knew I wanted more.
A few years prior, I completed a TEFL (Teach English as a Foreign Language) certification which enabled me to teach English anywhere in the world. Around the same time, I met a wonderful El Salvadorian boy living in my hometown. I placed my dreams of globetrotting on the back burner as our relationship developed. Carlos loved me perfectly; fiercely but giving me enough space to travel and be my own person. He encouraged me to spend a summer in Costa Rica learning Spanish and traveling around and didn’t think twice when my sister and I jetted off to the Dominican Republic for a week. He was always so supportive, but as the years started to fly by, I realized there was one giant dream that had been placed aside, but never really forgotten. A little voice started to whisper “Quit your job, look for English teaching jobs in Spain.”
After months of hemming and hawing, I finally came to the realization that it was now or never. For the first time in years, I followed that inner nudge and set about making plans. I applied for and received my Irish passport, began interviewing for jobs, and finally received an offer from an academy to teach English in a city called Valladolid. I knew absolutely nothing about this place, but I knew with every fiber of my being that I needed to take this leap of faith. It was time to have the hardest conversation of my life. I let Carlos know that after two incredible years together I needed to choose me. I had to pursue this audacious dream because I couldn’t bear to wonder “what if”. Carlos, being the fantastic human that he is, lovingly let me go.
My year in Valladolid, Spain was absolutely life changing. I was entirely on my own for the first time in my life. It was overwhelming but incredibly empowering at the same time. I signed up for Spanish classes and began going to “intercambios” where people from all over the world gather and practice different languages. I travelled all around Spain on the weekends, and even started solo traveling, which is one of my favorite pastimes to this day. I filled my belly with delicious Spanish food (and wine of course!) and danced until sunrise.
When the school year was over, I met up with my best friend and backpacked Europe for 6 weeks. It was an experience I will never forget, and one that set into motion an unconventional life full of travel and adventure. I came home entirely broke, but also an entirely different version of myself. To this day I am so glad that I said YES to my inner voice. I’m pretty sure everyone thought I was crazy walking away from the “perfect life, but I just knew I needed more.
Spoiler alert, Carlos and I found our way back to each other almost 7 years later and are now happily married. It was the most beautiful lesson that what is meant for you will never pass you by. In letting him go, and fearlessly chasing my dream, I began to live authentically for the very first time.
I realize now that little whisper I heard was my intuition and honing it over the years has brought me to the most amazing places. Over the past near decade, I have been to 43 countries and 6 continents. I have traveled the circumference of the world all by myself over the span of two months. I’ve lived abroad and spent countless summers backpacking Europe. It’s hard to believe that this beautiful life of mine all started with one seemingly insignificant, but all powerful YES!
So…do you have a dream that you’ve tucked away for “someday”? If so, this is your sign to go for it! Listen to that inner voice. That thing you can’t stop thinking about? It’s not silly, it’s your purpose. Those excuses that you keep making? I guarantee you can find a way to overcome each and every one of them. They say all you need is 20 seconds of insane courage, and although it may not be easy, I guarantee you it will be so worth it in the end!